My Dog, The Fear Farter

Yes, I've called my dog an asshole. He really is an asshole though I'm sure his cute pictures say otherwise.

But there another side to poor Rusty MONSTER.

He is a FEAR FARTER.

Yup. He farts.

When he's afraid of something he just lets one rip. It's downright smelly, disgusting and gross. You can ALWAYS tell that the fart comes from the dog.

Doorbell rings.

Dog farts.

Fedex truck parks in front of the house.

Dog farts.

Snowplow goes by.

Dog farts.

Move a big box.

Dog farts.

Move the baby gate.

Dog farts.

Get the picture?

And to be quite honest, I don't think there's training to overcome fear farting. I mean, what do you do? You can't exactly train people to not let one rip (unless you're me and you hold it in until you get home and get a huge stomachache from it). So I guess we'll have to live with the stench of a fear farting dog. That's Rusty for you. The fear farting asshole.

Christmas with Santa

It didn't go as well as I expected. The Monkey is great with strangers. Usually. Apparently big bearded ones are not her favorite. She took one look and definitely didn't like Santa. She's like me. I hated Santa. All of my pictures are crying ones too. Oh, well. It's an experience, right? The top pic is our Christmas card picture because that's the best one we got!

Andes Mint Chocolate Bark

OMG. Chocolate. Add Mint. Eat. AND SWOON.

Even Bimmer Man who doesn't really like chocolate eats this. DELISH.

 Gather your ingredients.

Start a double boiler. Melt the white chocolate. Add a 1/2 tsp of mint extract. Drizzle into a parchment lined baking sheet and spread to however much you want with a spatula.

Refrigerate for about 15 minutes. Just enough the let the chocolate set.

Start a new double boiler. Melt the chocolate chocolate (you know, the BROWN chocolate). Drizzle onto the white chocolate. Spread with a spatula and grab the Andes mint pieces. Sprinkle onto the still-warm chocolate and press them into the chocolate (this is so they don't fall off when you go to eat it). Then again, put into the fridge for another 20 minutes. Once set either use a knife to break apart OR just slam it against the counter a few times to break it into chunks. Whatever works.

Oy Vey.

We've got movement on the homefront.

As in I'm going to have to bring down the pack and play so I can pee type of movement.

Easy Cinnamon Roll Ups

 YUM!!!

Crescent Rolls

Cinnamon

Sugar

Butter

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Mix cinnamon and sugar to your liking. (I used 1/4 cup of sugar and just a little more than 1/2 tsp of cinnamon).

Unroll crescent rolls from their can (and they are WAY HARDER to open than they used to be!).

Spread a little butter on each roll.

Using a spoon, drizzle or pour cinnamon/sugar mix onto the rolls.

Roll each roll (HAHA!), starting with the larger end.

Bake for approximately 12 - 15 minutes. 

Make Your Own Baby Food - SQUASH

SUPER EASY!!

Bake/steam/cook your squash. Steam some other veggies. Put in blender. Add 1/4 - 1/2 cup of water. Puree. Put in ice cube trays to freeze. Label your bags. Add in the cubes. EASY.

To defrost I just stick in the microwave for 30 seconds, stir, taste to make sure it's not too hot.

I have the crazy kid that LOVES cold food though so I have to put it in the fridge for 10 minutes to cool it down from the microwave (even though it's room temp already!).

Salt Dough Ornaments

Salt dough is super easy to make (if it wasn't easy, halfway through i would have stopped and NOT even bothered to post that I tried! HA!)

2 cups flour
1 cup salt
1 cup water

When you're finished, dry them in a 250 degree oven for at least 3 hours.

My tips:

Roll out the dough thinly. Add extra flour when you roll it out if you don't have parchment paper to line your baking trays.

Add a hole for a string to hang them I used a straw.

I also did a few with Simone's hands and feet. I didn't press her prints in deep enough though so I think I'm going to have to paint them to show the outlines. Oh, well. You live and you learn!

Hot Ham & Cheese Sandwiches

Kings Hawaiin Sweet Rolls
1/2 Medium Onion, chopped
4 tbsp butter
Sliced Ham
Sliced Cheese (I used muenster)
Mustard

Preheat oven to 425 degrees.

In a saute pan, add butter and onions. Saute over medium to medium-low heat until onions are VERY soft.

Meanwhile, get your sandwich ingredients ready and slice rolls in half. I did end up separating out all the rolls.

Mustard goes on both top and bottom rolls. When the onions are done, add about half to both top and bottom halves of rolls.

Add the sliced ham and the sliced cheese. Put the tops onto the sandwiches. Pour the rest of the butter/onion mixture on the tops of the sandwiches.

Put into oven until cheese is melted and the bread is nice and crusty on top.

Eat like a mad person because they are so good!

Nightstands & Mid Century Modern

Mid Century Nightstand from West Elm - $249

Oy vey. I've been thinking a lot about our Mid Century House. (Yes, it IS Mid Century, built in 1949!) Not only do we have the original floors but the cove ceilings and plaster walls are original too.

And so I would like to decorate it MORE Mid Century. BUT I don't want it to look straight out of Mad Men (Ok, EARLY episodes of Mad Men).

I'm fairly certain that for $250 I could probably go shopping at antique stores, garage sales and whatnot next year and get more than just one nightstand though.

I just have to remember to not go too retro - definitely no davenports for this house.

Sweet Potato Fries

Never have I made sweet potato fries before (purchased from Trader Joe's, yes - on my own, no!). So I decided that they looked easy enough to make. They were!

Sweet Potato Fries

2 sweet potatoes

Olive Oil

Salt and Pepper

Preheat oven to 425 degrees.

Cut sweet potatoes into fries. Drizzle with olive oil, salt and pepper. Put on a baking sheet and into the oven. Flip over after 10 minutes and then continue cooking until as crispy as you like!

Crockpot Lasagna

So freakin' easy.

Seriously. And um, I do have to say that getting a piece of lasagna out of a crockpot is NOT easy. Trust. It looks like the lasagna leaped out of the pan and decided to plop down on the plate. HA.

I digress.

Still. EASY.

I added dried basil to the cheese mix and omitted the parsley. I used Barilla pasta sauce and added 1 can of garlic roasted tomatoes. After reading the comments in the original recipe, I cooked on low for 3 1/2 hours instead of 5. Any longer and I think this would have been mush.

Crockpot Lasagna (click the link to see the original!)

• 1 pound (16 ounces) ground beef
• 1/2 cup diced white onion
• 1 teaspoon minced garlic
• 1 (24 ounce) jar spaghetti sauce
• 1/2 cup water
• 1 (15 ounce) container ricotta cheese
• 2 cups mozzarella cheese
• 1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese
• 1 whole egg
• 2 Tablespoons fresh parsley or 2 teaspoons dried parsley
• 6 uncooked lasagna noodles

1. In a large skillet brown beef and onion. Add garlic and cook for one minute. Drain.
2. Add spaghetti sauce and water and simmer for about 5 minutes.
3. Mix ricotta, 1 1/2 cups mozzarella, 2 Tablespoons Parmesan, egg and parsley.
4. Pour 1 cup of spaghetti meat sauce into a 4 to 6 quart sized slow cooker. Place half of the noodles and half of the ricotta mixture on top of the sauce. Cover with 2 cups meat sauce. Top with remaining noodles (If the noodles don't fit exactly break them to fit) and cheese mixture and meat sauce.
5. Cook on low for 4 to 5 hours or until noodles are soft. Sprinkle with 1/2 cup of mozzarella and remaining parmesan. Cover with the lid to melt the cheese and let it sit for 10 minutes before serving.
6. Do not overcook and don't try to speed up the process by cooking it on high.
7. *Works best with a 4 to 6 quart size slow cooker.

Monkey Update

Holy crap. She's close to 8 months old!

I think all and all, I've finally got a routine down during the day (that doesn't much include the computer, sorry...). We've got naps timed now (thank goodness because that way I can actually eat a decent meal that's not just cheese & crackers), solid foods are going well (yay for sweet potato fries!) which means that I'm cooking a heck of a lot more than I have in the last few months.

Phew. Things are back to a new normal.

2012 Craft Fair Info

MIA. I went MIA. Totally flew under the radar. Didn't do much. Except crochet, rake, bake some squash.

But my fingers hurt. I've been crocheting for a very long time! OUCH!

BUT - check out the Holiday Boutique right HERE. And you can even see my little feature spot HERE.

Come and shop - there's tons of local artists and not just me - there's so many awesome items that I think this will be a ton of fun.

Here's the details:

Finch's Holiday Time Boutique:

Sat. Dec. 8th 11am - 5pm & Sun. Dec. 9th12noon-5pm 

10200 Hillside Lane West Minnetonka, MN 55305

And I Never Told You About The Neighborhood Burglar

Yes, yes, ladies & gents, we had a rash of burglaries throughout our neighborhood and July.

Stupid me even waved at the guy. TWICE.

One block north there was a burglary. During the day. When school was out. Kids were outside at all times during the day.

I didn't think too much of it. Except to lock the doors when I went for a walk.

Then the next day happened. THE GUY WAS WATCHING ME LEAVE. And our neighbor. He picked the neighbor's house to break into. He watched her leave. He watched me leave for our daily walk.

In 15 minutes he was in and out of her house. Jewelry was stolen.

So I set up the webcam and pointed it into the alley. If someone was going to break into our house, well then, I was bound and determined to catch him in the act. But Comcast decided to be stupid and cut in and out all day so no, it didn't work. And I was so disappointed because Comcast was stupid. Including the next day when I set up the webcam.

The next day my mom came over for lunch. We waved to a guy walking down the alley.

He broke into the house diagonal from us in the alley. RIGHT AFTER WE WAVED TO HIM. AND COMCAST WAS NOT WORKING. The internet was out. I could have caught him on tape.

Three days later I took the recycling out.

And said hi to TWO guys walking down the alley and decided to watch them. They did not say hi back.

My other neighbor popped out into the alley to watch them too. We called the police. Her husband followed them. Actually chased them. They split up, he followed one guy. The police caught one and questioned him. But they hadn't broken into a house yet so there was no evidence. But because they were followed and because we called the police we prevented a break-in.

But there were three more break-ins.

And eventually one guy was caught red-handed in a house in a different city.

So as you can see... I stay at home and stuff just happens to me.

Craft Show Coming Up!

I'm entering my crochet into a craft show this year in early December. I'm super excited but now the hard part begins. I have to finish two more scarves, get everything tagged and coded so they know what is mine and how much and what stock I have. SO EXCITING!! As soon as I know if I'm in and all the details, I'll post a link for more information, dates, times and where it is.

Here's a short preview of what I'll have in the show. I'll have mostly striped scarves, some shell stitch stuff, a few cowls and I'm thinking about putting some dishcloths in but we'll see - I don't think I have enough dishcloths to sell for a set if someone wants more than two.

New Fall Wreaths

 I made myself a new Fall wreath - it's just like the pink one that I made, only I used 4 yards of fabric instead of 3. It's much fuller and definitely better! I've got the hang of making these down, that's for sure!

 This pretty blue one is for my friend Kathy who recently purchased her first house. YAY! It's super cute and I can't wait to give it to her.

Edited for Sarah:

Here's the tutorial I posted earlier this year.

My iPhone Crashed

And burned.

Yikes.

I lost all of my photos from the last two years. I am an idiot and didn't sign up for the iCloud. DO IT NOW IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY. Simone's pictures are gone. I feel like the house burned down. But at least I sent Bimmer Man pics every day and put stuff up on Facebook. And videos... the video of her rolling over and me spilling a beer are gone. Darn. But I put stuff up on YouTube so...

They had to restore it twice at the Apple store.

And it crashed when I did the Os6 update. Grrr.... Usually it's Bimmer Man with the phone troubles.

The Catalog Has Arrived

Woo hoo!!!!! Today is almost as great as when the Ikea catalog comes!

Crochet - Dishclothes

Super easy. 25 rows of single crochet. Single crochet around to finish the piece. Weave in ends.

I have 7 that I can put in my Etsy shop. It's just a matter of finding the time to take photos!

New Crochet

I found clearance yarn at Joann Fabrics last time I was there. $1.97 per skein. But there were only 5 skeins and generally 1 scarf in specialty yarn is 3 skeins. I bought 3 skeins and now I'm decidedly regretful of not buying all 5, mostly because I could have done some sort of striped scarf with a cream yarn that I already have. Oh well. I suppose most of my scarves are unique anyway.

Late Wordless Wednesday